Trying to Get the Feeling Again
by chickamoomoo
Summary: Nope. not the Barry Manilow song, though its mentioned in there later. i f i sumarize, I'll give it away, but i think the title says it all. Draco lives a seemingly perfect life, but something is missing. **COMPLETE**
1. Draco's Perfect Life

Disclaimer: I own only Anna, Lorelei, and Aurora. All other characters belong to J.K. Rowling, whom I hope to be as good as some day. These include: Draco, Harry, etc.  
  
A/N: I want to thank those that took time to read and review 'Emily' and 'Hilary'. I seem to have a pattern going with titles, huh? Well, I hope you like this. I did when I first thought of it. I thought it would be best to give it a title other than Draco's girlfriend's name. If you don't think I chose an appropriate title, you may feel free to give a suggestion in a review or email. My address is: jeannicole89@wmconnect.com  
  
A/N: REVIEW, REVIEW!!!!!!!  
  
-Nicole ^_^  
  
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Chapter 1 Draco's Perfect Life  
  
"Draco," someone whispered.  
  
Draco opened his eyes to the beautiful sunlight streaming through the window of his room dancing in his wife, Anna's hair. "Morning already? I was having such a good dream, too." And he sat up, trying to recall what he had been dreaming of. He had been in a beautiful, dark forest. He was back a few years. He was seventeen again. He was searching for a particular ring he had lost. It was that ring he had been wearing since His fifth year at Hogwarts, when he gave it to him.  
  
He tried to hold onto the dream but by the time he realized it was going, it was long gone. He got up, kissed his wife and walked downstairs. Once there, he realized how much he missed the old days. When he and Anna had just gotten married and they were so in love. Now she was nothing more than an old habit. He longed for the days before Anna. Those were the days when he still had the one he truly loved. The one he wanted more than anything else.  
  
His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a tugging on his sleeve. He looked down into the blue-gray eyes, much like his own, that adorned the faces of his two daughters, Lorelei and Aurora. Aurora was looking at him happily while holding the even tinier hand of his younger daughter, Lorelei, who was struggling to stand, as she was only 9 months old.  
  
"Happy Birthday Daddy!" cried Aurora happily.  
  
"Thank you, Rory dear. I am very happy now, thanks to you." Draco answered as Rory handed him a card and a slightly sloppily wrapped present. He smiled that handsome smile of his.  
  
"Daddy, you're 23 now! You're old!" Rory said, wondering how old a person could get.  
  
"Rory, you're 5! You're going to be old tomorrow! I remember when I turned 6. That's when my father taught me to play Quidditch. We spent the whole day flying around the yard throwing balls to each other trying unsuccessfully to catch them. Back then I wasn't very good."  
  
"But you're great now, right daddy?"  
  
"Why of course. I'm going to teach you tomorrow, too."  
  
"I can't wait!"  
  
"What can't you wait for, dearest?" said Anna's voice from behind them.  
  
All of them turned to face her. Anna bent down and picked up Lorelei. "Well," Draco began, "I was just telling Rory that I plan to teach her Quidditch tomorrow."  
  
"Oh. I'm so sorry but I'll have to miss it. Don't you remember? My tour starts today, so I have to go to London right now to get ready to leave."  
  
He hadn't remembered. He had almost forgotten entirely what a famous musician she was. He was enjoying so much, the conversation with his little daughter, who was such a "daddy's girl". He liked being the "best daddy in the whole world" so much, that he sometimes forgot Anna altogether, as he marveled at how much his little girl had grown up. He pondered this for a moment. It wasn't that he no longer loved his wife. He just wasn't as attracted to her as before. He just found it too much to even admit to himself who he was really attracted to. He still wanted the one from so many years ago. If only he could find this person. He still even had the ring. He still wore it. Anna always asked why he kept it and where it came from. He never did say. He really didn't know himself why he kept it. He just had a feeling he should.  
  
His thoughts were again interrupted by Rory tugging on his sleeve. "Daddy, when mummy goes today, are you going to have a birthday party? You always have good parties."  
  
"And how would you know? You're not supposed to come."  
  
"I'm sorry daddy. I like your friends though. Especially Harry."  
  
"You know Harry? And better still, he's been coming?"  
  
"Is he not supposed to? I didn't know or I would have made him go. I'm sorry, Daddy."  
  
"It's alright, Rory. I just didn't know he'd been coming." Then, Draco was lost in his thoughts again. 


	2. Where Did The Feeling Go?

Disclaimer: See part 1  
  
A/N: Now that you've seen Draco's seemingly perfect life, you will see the whole story.  
  
A/N: I'm still new, so please don't hurt me if you don't like it. **looks for an excuse to say "blasphemous" unsuccessfully** Sparks, I still fail to see the reason or your (and TK Yuy's) obsession with that word. Oh, well. Review!  
  
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Chapter 2 Where did the Feeling Go?  
  
*Well,* thought Draco, *If he's there, why is he too cowardly to say something?* Then he knew the answer. It's not so much that he was cowardly, as much as their past making things really awkward.  
  
Now that he thought of it, Rory had had a great idea. He should have a party. It would give him an excuse to see Harry again. It had been a very long time. There were things that needed to be said. Things that should have been said long ago.  
  
As a matter of fact, the more he thought about it, the more he thought he should say. There was so much. Forget about the party. It was time for just a friendly catching up meeting. That's how he explained it to himself.  
  
The more he thought about Harry, the more he realized that the sparks that used to fly when he was with Anna were gone.  
  
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A/N: I know the chapters are very short, but bear with me. If you have a suggestion, let me know. 


	3. Catching Up

Disclaimer: I think I've done one of these already.  
  
A/N: To the inspiration, a.k.a., Sparks, I must say, I agree. Harry and Draco are just meant to be. Anything else would just be wrong!  
  
A/N: Please review. If you've read "Hilary" let me know if you think it's fixable. Do you so far like this?  
  
A/N: Andrea, thanks for the reviews! I appreciate it and I'm glad you're enjoying it. I know chapter 2 was short but I hope that's the shortest one! ************************************************************************  
  
Chapter 3 Catching Up  
  
Rory sat playing with the small bear she had gotten the day before, while Draco was trying to think of something to write to Harry. He wanted, no, needed, to talk to him, but how would he put it? He decided to just say that he needed to speak to Harry and that he should come to the manor, which he inherited upon the death of his father.  
  
He finished the letter and sent it out the window, carried by his beautiful eagle owl.  
  
"Daddy, is Mr. Harry coming here?" asked Rory.  
  
"I hope so, Rory dear. I haven't spoken to him in a really long time." He answered.  
  
"But he always comes to your parties, so why don't you ever talk to him?"  
  
"I never knew he was here. Why do you ask so many questions?"  
  
"I want to know why you want to talk to Harry. I know it's important. I may be just a little girl, but I'm not entirely stupid, daddy."  
  
"You're everything but stupid. If I tell you, will you promise not to tell Mummy? I believe I must tell somebody though."  
  
"Why not mummy? She would understand, I'm sure. You should write to her. Tell her 'bout Harry. I think my daddy likes him. And I think you know what I mean. You've got issues, daddy."  
  
"I know dear, but don't tell your mother. She doesn't need to know yet. I'll tell her when she's home and not so excited."  
  
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"Hello, Harry," Draco said, as he opened the door to a tall, thin man with the same beautiful green eyes he had back when they were together with the exception of the happy glow they once had. "You seem upset. Why?"  
  
"I was thinking," answered Harry. "About us. And what could have been."  
  
"I have, too. That's why you're here. I'm not sure why it ended and I was almost sure you would know. Come in."  
  
"Nice house you have here. And two lovely little girls, too." Harry said, looking around at Rory and Lorelei playing with Rory's bear. "Why, where is your wife?"  
  
"Her tour started a couple of days ago. She's in America at the present. Cincinnati, Ohio, I believe. New York was Yesterday."  
  
"Does she even know what we had?"  
  
"It was never brought up."  
  
"Tell her. She should know. Especially since Ben." Draco wondered why Harry had to bring up his son.  
  
Rory decided it was her turn to ask questions. "Daddy, who is Ben?"  
  
"Rory dear, Ben is your brother. Harry, might I ask what has become of you and Ben these days?"  
  
"We live quite happily in London. If you'd like, I could go home and get him so you might see him. It truly has been too long."  
  
"I'd like that. My boy." Draco's voice trailed off.  
  
"It's strange to look at him. He looks like you. Only with my eyes."  
  
"I think I'd very much like to see him. He's eight now, right?"  
  
"Yes. Let's go to my house. It isn't much, but Ben is there with a neighbor watching him for me. We can continue this there."  
  
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A/N: is it good? REVIEW! REVIEW! 


	4. What Happened?

Disclaimer: See part 1.  
  
A/N: as of now I have had 2 reviews. Why? Why do I even try? For my sake. It takes me to another world. In this world I don't exist, therefore I have no worries. Although, now I worry for Draco and Harry. How will they work out?  
  
A/N: if you don't review I shall be reduced to tears. How will I ever know if I'm any good? REVIEW!!!!!!!  
  
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Chapter 4 At Harry's House  
  
The first thing Draco saw, upon arriving at Harry's house was a boy with the same blonde hair that adorned his own head and those of his two daughters. When he looked into the face of his son he saw those eyes. The same eyes he betrayed six years earlier only on another face. He had left a look of pain in his ex- lover's eyes and those of his son reflected the same grief.  
  
To break the awful silence, and hoping to bring a smile to face of the other man, Draco said, "You can always tell a descendant of the amazing Lily Potter, can't you? You both have her eyes. That's good, though. They're amazing." His voice trailed off as he remembered the long hours he would spend staring into those eyes. Suddenly his gaze fell to the ring Harry wore. "You kept that?" he asked softly.  
  
"How could I not, after what we had?"  
  
"What happened anyway?"  
  
"Not now, Draco. Meet your son first. Ben!" he shouted, turning toward the young boy, "Ben, come here now. Meet your other father."  
  
Draco heard a small voice yell back as a boy turned to face him, "Papa, you said my other father was never coming back. Why?"  
  
"I never thought he never would. I always hoped, though."  
  
Ben's face lit up like Methuselah's birthday cake. He knew his papa told the truth, for the face he saw was identical to his own. He put down the small shovel he was using to uproot the flower bed, and ran to his father and embraced him. He had dreamed so much of this day. "Dad, why now? Why weren't you always here? Papa said you didn't care but I never wanted to believe it. I knew you would come back, and I'm so happy!"  
  
"Son, I would like you to meet your sisters. I married a woman after I left your father. At the time I didn't care about your father but I always cared about you. Never doubt that. I care now, but I can't stay forever. I'll need to go back to my wife. I'll always come to visit, though. I promise."  
  
"Why? Don't you love us?" The look of hurt tore Draco to pieces. He couldn't bear it, so he changed the subject.  
  
"Son, what do you like to do? What sort of games do you play?" Draco asked him eagerly.  
  
"I like cars! I have a toy bus that papa charmed so it could fly!"  
  
"That sounds truly amazing. What else do you like?"  
  
"I like to play at the park! I also like to read books. Papa says I've already read more books than you ever read in your whole life! I don't believe him. On another day he said you the smartest person on earth! Are you?"  
  
"I wish, but unfortunately, that isn't true by a long shot."  
  
"Well, I don't mind. Will you stay here all day? I want to learn about my dad."  
  
Just then a boy of about fifteen came out of the house and Ben ran to him and grabbed his arm and dragged him over to Draco. "Brian, this is my other dad. Dad, this is my friend. He lives next door and he came to watch me when papa went to see you."  
  
After this introduction, they all went to the park. Ben knew nearly everyone there and dragged Draco around introducing him to everyone. Even the ones that Draco already knew. These people were those that knew that Draco was married to Anna, and had no idea that the boy they were always offering sweets to was the one and only Draco Malfoy's son. When they arrived back at Harry's house, the children were so tired that they promptly went to sleep, leaving the adults alone.  
  
"Now, Harry, tell me what went wrong."  
  
"You wanted out. After Ben was born you were ashamed. You needed a different life. You needed to start over, leaving me to carry all shame. I was hurt, Draco. I still am, and I think Ben is too. He has always wanted to know you and want to just leave so quickly. Why even bother walking back into our lives. You may as well have just let us be."  
  
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A/N: please review. No more until someone does! That's a promise! 


	5. Waiting for Anna

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and Co. but I do own Ben, Anna, Aurora, and Lorelei.  
  
A/N: Umm. none really. review please. No more until somebody reviews this chapter. Might as well be you!!!  
  
A/N: Maybe I do have some. I just want to say how much I appreciate the few reviews I have gotten. Why does no one review? Nobody reads this stuff. **sniffles**  
  
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Chapter 5 Waiting For Anna  
  
A few months after the meeting with Harry, Draco waited worriedly for his wife. He had to tell her eventually about him and Harry and Ben. He had to tell her as soon as she came home. He was nervous for a month before she came home. He was very worried about how she would take it. He wondered if she might even understand. He was suddenly reminded of the old muggle song "Trying to Get the Feeling Again." (sunng by Barry Manilow ) He wandered the house singing to himself  
  
"I've been up, down  
  
Trying to get the feeling again.  
  
All around.  
  
Trying to get the feeling again.  
  
The one that made me shiver,  
  
Made my knees start to quiver  
  
Every time she walked in.  
  
And I've looked high, low  
  
Everywhere I possibly can.  
  
But there's no  
  
Trying to get the feeling again  
  
It seemed to disappear  
  
Just as fast as it came"  
  
After that he couldn't remember the words. He though about Anna for a moment. He wondered how she was able to think of a muggle song for every situation. She had taught him that one a long time ago. He wondered what she would think of when she heard. Just then she walked in the door. 


	6. That ol' Wind

Disclaimer: I seem to have done this before.  
  
A/N: um. review. **gives her Baptist pouting lip** please?  
  
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Chapter 6 Telling Anna  
  
"Anna?" Draco yelled from the kitchen as she hugged Rory and Lorelei. "Dear, is that you?"  
  
"Yes, Draco, dear. I'm so happy to be home. I've missed you all so much." Seeing the guilty look on Draco's face, she asked, "Dear, what have you done?"  
  
"Well, nothing. within the past 8 years anyway."  
  
Looking confused, Anna asked, "What do you mean?"  
  
"When I was 15, I became a father. I should have told you sooner, but it never seemed appropriate to conversation."  
  
Anna seemed in denial. "You're joking, right? That was really funny," she said beginning to laugh weakly.  
  
"I'm serious Anna. I have an 8 year old son named Ben."  
  
Still denying the slightest notion that she wasn't his first love, she said, "That was even funnier the second time. It nearly seemed as though you meant it."  
  
"I did," said Draco, becoming frustrated.  
  
Anna began to cry. "Are you going back to his mother?"  
  
Draco wasn't prepared for this question. He didn't think he'd have to explain that Ben didn't have a mother, but another father.  
  
"Umm. well, dear, I. Ben. he has no mother."  
  
"No mother?" Anna sighed with relief.  
  
"No. No mother. Another father. I'm." he trailed off.  
  
Anna fainted.  
  
He left her peacefully, for he knew she needed her rest before another gig in a restaurant nearby. He went upstairs and packed his things. He would get divorce papers the next day. He went and packed the girls' things and they all left and went to Harry's place, where they were welcomed warmly.  
  
Draco was amazed by all of the muggle "contraptions" Harry owned. He was particularly fascinated by the television set.  
  
When all of the children were asleep, Harry pulled Draco into his arms and whispered, "I'm glad you're back, love."  
  
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The next day, he saw how hurt Anna had been through her singing. On television, which he had finally figured out, he saw her restaurant gig that had been awaited by all of London for several months. When he tuned in he heard a song he knew she'd be singing ever since he told her. "Where did the Feeling Go" by Selena. she often made a habit of redoing other artists' music. He knew he had hurt Anna, but, as Garth Brooks stated, "Now, they're finally where their hearts have always been."  
  
THE END 


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